Comments on: Pleaes Halp!

By: Sam

Sam — Tue, 02 Nov 2004 07:09:15 +0000

You make good writing words, but “S” at end of “Barnes and Noble” is for talking, not for writing. If writing on purpose, probably deserve apostrophe.

Maybe I think more later.

By: echillri

echillri — Mon, 01 Nov 2004 20:31:41 +0000

Thanks, everyone, for the help. Especially Mr. Gursky; without his penetrating insight, I couldn’t even tie my shoes in the morning, much less apply to law school.

Marc, I’m worried I may have stumbled into some jargon accidently. By “moral imperative” I only mean to say that it would be a moral failing on our part to not pursue the potential to provide these resources to those remote villages (also I’d like work in that it’s a two-way street, that connecting these places to the internet allows the rest of us to learn from them as well, but there might not be room for that). If instead I’ve invoked a particular IP concept, then I’ll have to rephrase.
As for my father, it’s interesting, he’s been a long-time proponent of fair use, not as a matter of principle or policy, but as a good business practice. Basically he knows locking the work down and charging for every re-use of an image is going to result in fewer clients buying initial uses. He also draws a wide line between commercial and non-commercial uses, almost always only charging for the former.

Ellen, thank you for the edits, those are perfect examples of the poor phrasing you stop being able to notice when you’ve rearranged a paragraph 10 times.

Dan, thank you for reminding me about the centers, I definitely meant to leave space for names. I really don’t think I have space to get into the alternative compensation schemes, though, even if most of what I’d say would be “roll back the term extensions.”

By: Dan

Dan — Mon, 01 Nov 2004 19:29:38 +0000

I like it. It sets you apart from the typical applicant because you actually have a specific reason you want to go to law school. It even sets you apart from other kids who say they like IP law either because they majored in engineering or just because its so god damn sexy.
I’ll take a stab at offering a few suggestions although I wouldn’t say I think these are crucial. Maybe you should throw in a sentence or two about what a compensation scheme that encourages more work would look like, just to reinforce that this is an issue that you have seriously thought about. Also, you might want to try and tailor this essay for the individual schools–some of the schools your applying to have “centers” for the study of internet and law or society and/or notable professors in the field. Even if you just add on a sentence or two at the end I think it will be really good.
By the way, I’m proud of you for getting this draft done. If you can get your Apps in by Thanksgiving you’ll be in good shape.

By: ellen

ellen — Mon, 01 Nov 2004 15:35:41 +0000

evan, just a few small edits. in the first paragraph, youjuse “even” again in the sentence “I was beginning…” . Find a substitute. also “communicating” entire books?

in the second paragraph,second sentence, the “It” doesn’t have a clear referent

Third graph, maybe insert “as I understand it” after “yetit is not, and that…”

I take the point of the person who thought you might need more balance. aren’t there other prolific cultures with a different law? what about all the science patents coming from asia now? what’s their law?

By: the gursk

the gursk — Mon, 01 Nov 2004 03:04:16 +0000

Having not read your essay, but knowing you as well as I do, I’m anticipating that you used too many words and not enough bright colorful pictures. law schools like pictures. Sometimes you just gotta play the game.

By: marc

marc — Sat, 30 Oct 2004 03:09:35 +0000

I have two concerns:

1- Recognizing the severe space limitations imposed on you, I’d still recommend explaining the moral imperative. While it’s self-evident to you and me, you might be surprised as to what an arcane subject IP is to most lawyers.

2- Law school emphasizes arguing from both sides of an issue. Maybe you should talk more about IP protections. You mention your dad as well as finding alternative compensation schemes, but in the context of your essay it’s almost like you are paying mere lip service to his ability to feed, clothe and shelter you.

Finally, I wouldn’t add either of these at the expense of your more informal moments. I think you should leave the essay as it is rather than cut the banter in favor of further analysis. In fact, maybe you can add another ‘joke’ near the end to balance the tone better. Your LSAT & GPA will speak to your ability to reason well and do good, serious work. (OK, so I guess there was a third concern.)

Good essay, though. Better than mine was…