Fox News really is the Devil.
And I’m not even talking about just Bill O’Reilly here. How is it that anyone takes Fox News seriously? Even if we grant them that they are genuinely seeking to provide a “fair and balanced” middle point between left and right, two problems arise. One, their method of accomplishing this is to take the extreme right and the extreme left and let them scream at each other, never even having a rational discussion, much less agreeing on anything. Two, they specifically hire idiots to espouse conservative viewpoints and give them their own shows. I’ve heard many intelligent conservatives argue persuasively; none of them have ever been on Fox News, and I can’t imagine they ever will be.
This (via words mean things) is what got me going down this road today. I don’t think it really requires an explaination as to why this speeds from obnoxious to insulting, rolling right through ridiculous without a stop. I would like to say, though, if Fox News is the Devil, then Ann Coulter is certainly Satan’s Whore Numero Uno. She exists simply for Rupert Murdoch and his old wrinkled cronies to have some new pictures to jerk off on, now that their old glossies of Nancy Reagan have become entirely encrusted with their venomous spooj. She’s not exactly hot, but blond and not-as-wrinkled-as-Barbara-Bush will have to do, given the cows in the rest of the herd.
Some of my more astute readers may notice I’ve gotten a bit ad hominem in my argument. In the case of Ann Coulter, there are few other options; she doesn’t make arguments so much as rant and rave, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned from the Black Hebrews who hang out around Times Square (the ones who insist I’m not human because “hue-man” means “colored man”), it’s that arguing with raving lunatics is a waste of one’s precious time.
As for Fox News, it just makes me very disappointed in Americans that they have decided it is the best news on cable. CNN isn’t perfect by a long shot, but at least they try to be objective, try to get Americans to think before they jump to conclusions most of the time. Fox News is following in the grand tradition of the Fox Network; give the people whatever will get them riled up. The problem is, with news you are working over peoples’ ideas about the real world; the bias inherent in Fox News and its abysmal level of intellectual discourse is far more dangerous than a thousand more seasons of Joe Millionaire. Besides, eventually even the pygmy women on Papua New Guinea will be on to the scam, and then Joe Millionaire will die a quiet death, alone and unmourned. Bill O’Reilly and Ann Coulter, however, will probably have their brains transplanted into immortal baby-eating robots, sustaining themselves on the hordes of “traitorous” liberal infants roaming the streets of New York.
Weep for America, my friends. Weep for the children.
evan :: Oct.21.2003 :: Notions :: 5 Comments »
Daaaaaaaaaaamn!!!! Kennageddawidniss!!!
Wow, I am so relieved, because I had thought that you had given up writing your blog, and that had made me sad
good to see you’re back!! –eocs
I’m curious as to why you continue to rail against Fox. First of all, you are only stating what is obvious to those with more than two brain cells to rub together. Second, there are so few of us that fit into that category I feel that it is folly to draw attention to us. Just shut up and munch some Soylent Green before they catch on that we know. The monkeys — I mean masses — don’t like it when you show you are smarter than them. And these monkeys don’t just throw poo. They throw you in jail after a Congressional hearing…
It is true that I am afeared of the Un-American Activities Committee 2000 (Da Return), and yet I also feel that I don’t do enough. The horseshit that passes for thought and truth in this country is not to be idly swallowed.
I am most certainly preaching to the choir here, but I gotta start somewhere. My rhetoric and invective must be iron-clad before I take it to the streets and save the people from themselves. Only then can we be united as one in our war against the evil sexualists who would take our statues away.
And just when you thought it was over, it is. There’s not gonna be a Christmas this year, Timmy. The Devil killed Santa Claus and took over.
preaching to the converted isn’t always pointless, sometimes its funny. this time is was both funny and obviously inspired by caffine.
off to wells fargo, for me…